Justify!

An hour before the wedding, I dye my dress and hair black. The guests show up 2 hours too early. We forget to write vows.


These are the nightmares that are plaguing me nearly every night now. It stems from my looming to-do list and only 49 days left until the big day. Yikes! Everyone has been very supportive, and although I have no real delegating to do just yet, it helps to know that I do have glue-gun assistants, cupcake-icers, and scissor-toting helpers waiting in the wings. And yet, I am still freaking out. Maybe I still feel alone in my stubbornness: I still think that we can BBQ ourselves (if only because I can't bear to relinquish control over such a major aspect). Am I on edge? Too difficult to live with? Entirely beyond control and reason?

The answer is no. Sometimes justification can come in the form of an out-of-the-blue Facebook message from an old College friend:

"...If I can give you any advice, get as much done now as you can. And I know you've probably already heard it, but really, I mean it. We (The Duke & I) got married last weekend. The reception was at his parents place in the old bank barn, and we pretty much tried to do everything single handedly, between chores (he is a dairy farmer) of course. We tried to keep it local as best we could (food, wine and favor wise) and did as much DIY as possible. I'm telling you right now that every single all night craft session and possibly turning your poor families (including the ones from way out of town) into slaves the week before, is perfectly okay. And TOTALLY worth it. You might be up until 6am the night before the big day, and be running on 2 hours sleep the day of, but it will ALL be worth it. It really, really will.

I hope you try to enjoy it, and if you need to vent because Aunt A. is using the scissors, instead of the Exact-o blade to cut tags out, I'm totally here. Or if Aunt P. is wrapping the caramel corn (that you've been working on for hours) 5 times around instead of the 3 times in red twine like you had asked, I will totally be understanding. Hunting for 300 'made in England' antique pie plates to serve the pie on because home made pie tastes better on fancy plates, is totally acceptable behavior. And collecting endless kitschy salt and pepper sets for each table is okay too. In the end, you'll probably be totally exhausted since the wedding is a second full time job with overtime, but it will be the best day ever. EVER. And it's okay is you don't do that weird ass traditional stuff like garter throwing or allowing speeches where drunken uncles yap on endlessly about what any sane (or sober) person would consider totally inappropriate.

I hope you get everything done on your list, and if you need to vent. I'll relish it. I think I'm in wedding craft with drawl, so if you need help, I will totally follow your instructions and won't try to do it my way, honest.

Remember, it really is worth it Dayna."

Thank you, T. You really don't know how empowered I feel now!